1 00:00:00,750 --> 00:00:03,989 ? Boo, boo, boo, boo ? 2 00:00:04,190 --> 00:00:07,649 ? Boo, boo, boo, boo ? 3 00:00:07,850 --> 00:00:12,020 ? Boo, boo, boo, boo ? 4 00:00:12,230 --> 00:00:16,149 ? Boo, boo, boo, boo ? 5 00:00:16,450 --> 00:00:20,409 ? Boo, boo, boo, boo ? 6 00:00:20,710 --> 00:00:23,000 ? Boo, boo, boo, boo ? 7 00:00:23,760 --> 00:00:24,829 [laughs] 8 00:00:24,830 --> 00:00:25,999 Ooh! [growls] 9 00:00:26,000 --> 00:00:27,679 - Mommy! - Aaaaaaah! 10 00:00:27,680 --> 00:00:29,080 - Duncan! - Duncan! 11 00:00:29,081 --> 00:00:31,258 12 00:00:31,583 --> 00:00:34,440 [chewing loudly] 13 00:00:36,040 --> 00:00:38,480 Really enjoying that pizza, huh, Claire? 14 00:00:38,490 --> 00:00:40,799 Oh, yes. I never get pizza at home. 15 00:00:40,800 --> 00:00:43,300 [chuckles] Both my parents are heart surgeons. 16 00:00:43,310 --> 00:00:44,560 They call pizza heart bombs. 17 00:00:44,570 --> 00:00:46,719 Ah, well, we do it every once in a while. 18 00:00:46,720 --> 00:00:50,999 Every Friday's pizza night because Mommy's too damn tired. 19 00:00:51,000 --> 00:00:55,059 [chuckles] What? She doesn't know what days are. 20 00:00:55,060 --> 00:00:57,890 - Monday, Tuesday... - Eat your pizza. 21 00:00:57,900 --> 00:00:58,900 [chuckles] 22 00:00:58,990 --> 00:01:00,560 What's so funny? "Jay Leno's Garage"? 23 00:01:00,570 --> 00:01:03,670 - I'm watching "Shut Up, Trish." - Wait, what is "Shut Up, Trish"? 24 00:01:03,680 --> 00:01:05,280 You've never heard of "Shut Up, Trish?" 25 00:01:05,304 --> 00:01:07,239 It's the funniest thing. It's so funny. 26 00:01:07,240 --> 00:01:09,419 Don't feel bad, Mrs. Harris. I've never heard of it either. 27 00:01:09,420 --> 00:01:11,020 My parents don't let me have a cell phone 28 00:01:11,044 --> 00:01:12,070 because they think that... 29 00:01:12,080 --> 00:01:14,669 Yeah, yeah, they call 'em brain bombs. We get it, Claire. 30 00:01:14,670 --> 00:01:17,189 Oh, "Shut Up, Trish" is this hilarious video 31 00:01:17,190 --> 00:01:19,579 where, like, a mom is trying to buy her daughter a shirt, 32 00:01:19,580 --> 00:01:21,529 and then the girl tells her mom to shut up. 33 00:01:21,530 --> 00:01:22,769 She's my hero. 34 00:01:22,770 --> 00:01:26,179 - That shirt looks nice on you, honey. - Shut up, Trish! 35 00:01:26,180 --> 00:01:27,529 [laughter] 36 00:01:27,530 --> 00:01:29,429 Mommy, tell me this shirt looks nice 37 00:01:29,430 --> 00:01:33,019 - so I can tell you to shut up. - So now it is funny to be rude 38 00:01:33,020 --> 00:01:35,859 to the woman who loves you more than anything in the world 39 00:01:35,860 --> 00:01:38,829 and is just trying to buy you a darling top. 40 00:01:38,830 --> 00:01:41,769 Yeah, and she's stupid rich. She's got 12 million likes, 41 00:01:41,770 --> 00:01:43,529 danced with Ellen on "The Ellen Show," 42 00:01:43,530 --> 00:01:45,789 and is playing the villain in the next Spider-Man movie. 43 00:01:45,790 --> 00:01:49,299 Whoa, one viral video, and you're set for life. 44 00:01:49,300 --> 00:01:51,369 [harp strums] 45 00:01:51,370 --> 00:01:52,969 - [groans] - Cut! 46 00:01:52,970 --> 00:01:55,280 I'm sorry. Can I kill Spider-Man? 47 00:01:55,290 --> 00:01:58,399 - You're playing the villain. - But I'm a viral star. 48 00:01:58,400 --> 00:02:02,399 - Swap. - And action. 49 00:02:02,400 --> 00:02:04,740 [bones brake] [harp strums] I gotta go. 50 00:02:06,070 --> 00:02:07,820 Hmm. 51 00:02:09,300 --> 00:02:12,639 Hey, looks like your friend Cody is having a party. 52 00:02:12,640 --> 00:02:14,910 Yeah, his dad's having heart surgery, so he's throwing a rager. 53 00:02:14,911 --> 00:02:17,639 My parents are doing the surgery. It's their date night. 54 00:02:17,640 --> 00:02:19,990 That's nice. Be home by 9:00, 55 00:02:19,991 --> 00:02:22,309 and take this untouched veggie pizza 56 00:02:22,310 --> 00:02:23,979 that we had to order for Claire. 57 00:02:23,980 --> 00:02:27,000 I wasn't invited because I'm at a music festival this weekend. 58 00:02:27,024 --> 00:02:29,649 - But you're not. - That's what unpops like us say 59 00:02:29,650 --> 00:02:33,509 - when we're not invited to save face. - Stop! 60 00:02:33,510 --> 00:02:35,269 We're not supposed to tell our parents our deepest hurts 61 00:02:35,270 --> 00:02:36,930 because they feel they have to fix it. 62 00:02:36,940 --> 00:02:39,104 Come on, let's go post pictures of ourselves 63 00:02:39,105 --> 00:02:41,269 in floppy hats and say we're at Coachella. 64 00:02:41,270 --> 00:02:45,499 Jack, our daughter is an unpop! We have to fix it. 65 00:02:45,500 --> 00:02:47,929 But we always tell her popularity doesn't matter. 66 00:02:47,930 --> 00:02:49,509 It's who you are on the inside. 67 00:02:49,510 --> 00:02:53,179 Well, of course we say that, but we both know that's not true. 68 00:02:53,180 --> 00:02:55,359 Remember how popular we were in high school? 69 00:02:55,360 --> 00:02:56,450 Were we ever! 70 00:02:56,460 --> 00:02:58,609 We never had a night with nothing to do. 71 00:02:58,610 --> 00:03:01,129 It was exhausting being as popular as we were. 72 00:03:01,130 --> 00:03:02,869 [together] I had two dates for the prom. 73 00:03:02,870 --> 00:03:03,940 You did? 74 00:03:03,950 --> 00:03:06,869 They even gave us the yearbook cover. 75 00:03:06,870 --> 00:03:08,830 If we could get the pops to hang with our unpop, 76 00:03:08,854 --> 00:03:11,360 - they'd see she's a total pop. - Let's meddle. 77 00:03:11,361 --> 00:03:13,289 [together] Go parents! 78 00:03:13,290 --> 00:03:14,809 - Yeah! - Pow. 79 00:03:14,810 --> 00:03:18,369 - Can I go to Bradley's house? - Sure, hop on. 80 00:03:18,370 --> 00:03:20,730 [grunts] Go, Jing! 81 00:03:21,980 --> 00:03:23,979 [video game beeping] 82 00:03:23,980 --> 00:03:26,319 I win. Suck it, I guess. 83 00:03:26,320 --> 00:03:28,040 - Play again? - Whatever. 84 00:03:28,050 --> 00:03:29,139 [groan together] 85 00:03:29,140 --> 00:03:30,969 Guys, what are we doing with our lives? 86 00:03:30,970 --> 00:03:33,399 We're supposed to be the generation that stops climate change, 87 00:03:33,400 --> 00:03:36,549 - ends gun violence, and frees the nip. - Mia's right. 88 00:03:36,550 --> 00:03:38,660 I could donate these coins to the homeless 89 00:03:38,670 --> 00:03:40,559 instead of just buying another backwards hat. 90 00:03:40,560 --> 00:03:42,330 - I'm fired up. - Hell yeah! 91 00:03:42,340 --> 00:03:44,409 Let's go change the world. 92 00:03:44,410 --> 00:03:47,229 Let's get famous by making a viral video. 93 00:03:47,230 --> 00:03:49,509 Hell yeah! Let's go do that. 94 00:03:49,510 --> 00:03:50,899 [jar shatters] 95 00:03:50,900 --> 00:03:53,679 I was so close... Hey, wait up! 96 00:03:53,680 --> 00:03:56,089 If people thought "Shut Up, Trish" was funny, 97 00:03:56,090 --> 00:03:59,180 wait until they hear me tell my grandma to shut up. 98 00:03:59,190 --> 00:04:02,440 - Livestream up, Yangzi? - You know I'm rolling. 99 00:04:03,250 --> 00:04:06,339 [snoring] 100 00:04:06,340 --> 00:04:07,599 Shut up, Grandma! 101 00:04:07,600 --> 00:04:10,599 What in the good Lord's name have I done 102 00:04:10,600 --> 00:04:14,420 to inspire such cruelty in you? 103 00:04:14,430 --> 00:04:18,440 - No, Grandma, it's just a joke. - No, it's obvious I've failed you. 104 00:04:18,450 --> 00:04:21,539 I'll pack my things and go back to Dayton. 105 00:04:21,540 --> 00:04:24,379 No, Grandma! Please don't leave! 106 00:04:24,380 --> 00:04:27,289 Ugh, I think a piece of the devil got in me. 107 00:04:27,290 --> 00:04:30,379 [sobbing] You're my everything, Grandma! You're my everything. 108 00:04:30,380 --> 00:04:34,869 Oh, now hush. Come hug your grandma. 109 00:04:34,870 --> 00:04:35,780 [sobs] 110 00:04:35,781 --> 00:04:38,299 [both together] ? Swing low ? 111 00:04:38,300 --> 00:04:41,559 ? Sweet chariot ? 112 00:04:41,560 --> 00:04:45,850 ? Coming for to carry me home ? [all crying] 113 00:04:47,810 --> 00:04:49,120 What up, free world? 114 00:04:49,130 --> 00:04:50,380 This is bottle flip. 115 00:04:50,390 --> 00:04:52,389 I'm gonna go for 1,000 in a row. 116 00:04:52,390 --> 00:04:55,149 One. All right, now, one. 117 00:04:55,150 --> 00:04:56,909 Hoo. One. 118 00:04:56,910 --> 00:04:58,149 Dang. One. 119 00:04:58,150 --> 00:04:59,740 Shoot. One. 120 00:04:59,750 --> 00:05:01,079 One, one. 121 00:05:01,080 --> 00:05:03,309 Okay, we 'bout to... nope, one. 122 00:05:03,310 --> 00:05:05,580 One, one. All right, you get it. 123 00:05:06,810 --> 00:05:10,960 All right, now push your face into that bread nice and slow. 124 00:05:12,760 --> 00:05:14,589 And who's the audience for this again? 125 00:05:14,590 --> 00:05:17,550 It's better you don't know. Just keep facing. 126 00:05:21,430 --> 00:05:24,509 All right, America and Spider-Man director, 127 00:05:24,510 --> 00:05:26,769 I'm about to do something so dangerous, 128 00:05:26,770 --> 00:05:30,270 I'm gonna break the Internet and hopefully both my legs. 129 00:05:30,280 --> 00:05:33,169 I'm gonna run down the up escalator 130 00:05:33,170 --> 00:05:38,080 in a little stunt I call... "running down the up escalator." 131 00:05:40,010 --> 00:05:41,509 [inhales deeply] 132 00:05:41,510 --> 00:05:43,529 [screams] 133 00:05:43,530 --> 00:05:46,109 Take that, "Shut Up, Trish." 134 00:05:46,110 --> 00:05:48,530 [grunts] 135 00:05:48,540 --> 00:05:51,350 Ugh, help! 136 00:05:51,360 --> 00:05:54,359 [all grunting] 137 00:05:54,360 --> 00:05:56,209 Gotta end sometime, right? 138 00:05:56,210 --> 00:05:58,879 - Ooh. - Ow. 139 00:05:58,880 --> 00:06:01,450 Let's bounce. I will not be Blarted. 140 00:06:01,460 --> 00:06:04,560 [all wincing and groaning] 141 00:06:07,040 --> 00:06:09,810 Oh, my God, Cody has a chest hair. 142 00:06:09,820 --> 00:06:12,370 And look at that shark tooth necklace. 143 00:06:12,380 --> 00:06:14,130 I heard it's from Fort Lauderdale. 144 00:06:14,140 --> 00:06:16,049 [together] Ooh. 145 00:06:16,050 --> 00:06:18,309 [pop music] 146 00:06:18,450 --> 00:06:21,610 Cool party. And cooler shark tooth necklace. 147 00:06:21,620 --> 00:06:25,139 - Somebody's been to Fort Lauderdale. - Jack, focus. 148 00:06:25,140 --> 00:06:28,309 We are here for our depressingly unpopular daughter. 149 00:06:28,310 --> 00:06:30,620 Right, let's do this. 150 00:06:32,390 --> 00:06:34,539 Hey! [all gasp] 151 00:06:34,540 --> 00:06:35,480 What happened to my water? 152 00:06:35,481 --> 00:06:38,139 Hands up! Pool party enforcement. 153 00:06:38,174 --> 00:06:40,539 Looks like your parents didn't pay the water bill. 154 00:06:40,540 --> 00:06:44,549 Guess your party fun is all dried up. 155 00:06:44,550 --> 00:06:47,569 - Unless... - Unless what? 156 00:06:47,570 --> 00:06:50,899 Unless there was a more awesome party venue. 157 00:06:50,900 --> 00:06:54,559 Maybe... I don't know... say, across the street? 158 00:06:54,560 --> 00:06:55,669 I'm cold, man. 159 00:06:55,670 --> 00:06:57,729 Stop acting weird and tell us where to go. 160 00:06:57,730 --> 00:07:00,650 Achieving viral fame is a lot harder than it looks. 161 00:07:00,660 --> 00:07:02,489 Hats off to that farting priest. 162 00:07:02,490 --> 00:07:04,419 You kids are in a lot of trouble. 163 00:07:04,420 --> 00:07:05,569 [all gasp] 164 00:07:05,570 --> 00:07:06,840 Wait, I said that wrong. 165 00:07:06,850 --> 00:07:08,509 You kids are gonna be rich and famous. 166 00:07:08,510 --> 00:07:11,170 I'm Daryl Chrisakowsi, senior VP of digital 167 00:07:11,171 --> 00:07:13,830 youth marketing for Stroke-a-Cola energy drink. 168 00:07:13,840 --> 00:07:16,909 That's the drink that gave all those test mice super diabetes. 169 00:07:16,910 --> 00:07:19,509 - Give me some. - I saw your escalator video. 170 00:07:19,510 --> 00:07:20,950 You saw our video? Did we go viral? 171 00:07:20,974 --> 00:07:23,509 No, my dad's a mall cop, and he told me about it, 172 00:07:23,510 --> 00:07:24,790 but I think you're extreme enough 173 00:07:24,814 --> 00:07:27,374 to be the new face of our fine product. 174 00:07:28,090 --> 00:07:29,519 But first, you need to make a video 175 00:07:29,520 --> 00:07:30,699 featuring Stroke-a-Cola, 176 00:07:30,700 --> 00:07:33,949 and it needs to get a million views in the next 12 hours. 177 00:07:33,950 --> 00:07:36,189 - Can you do it? - [all] Hell yeah. 178 00:07:36,190 --> 00:07:39,379 I don't know. I think we all have concussions. 179 00:07:39,380 --> 00:07:42,029 I mean, hell yeah! 180 00:07:42,030 --> 00:07:43,269 Kimberly! 181 00:07:43,270 --> 00:07:46,219 Ugh, I don't care which Beach Boy died! 182 00:07:46,220 --> 00:07:48,050 We have a surprise for you! 183 00:07:49,220 --> 00:07:50,299 [both gasp] 184 00:07:50,300 --> 00:07:52,219 Every kid in town. 185 00:07:52,220 --> 00:07:54,129 [both scream] 186 00:07:54,130 --> 00:07:57,059 [wailing] [grunts] 187 00:07:57,360 --> 00:07:58,772 Hey. 188 00:08:01,750 --> 00:08:03,509 [indistinct chatter] 189 00:08:03,510 --> 00:08:04,829 What the hell is going on? 190 00:08:04,830 --> 00:08:06,269 We hijacked Cody's party 191 00:08:06,270 --> 00:08:09,259 and turned it into Kimberpalooza. 192 00:08:09,260 --> 00:08:12,429 Are you insane? I can't host a middle school party. 193 00:08:12,430 --> 00:08:14,019 First of all, you're here. 194 00:08:14,020 --> 00:08:16,689 Chillax, baby, we got everything you need, 195 00:08:16,690 --> 00:08:20,908 starting with T-T-Twister! 196 00:08:21,100 --> 00:08:25,119 Blu-ray director's cut of "The Secret Life of Pets." 197 00:08:25,120 --> 00:08:27,770 What could they be up to? We'll just have to find out! 198 00:08:27,780 --> 00:08:29,180 And the one thing 199 00:08:29,190 --> 00:08:31,689 any boy-girl party wouldn't be complete without. 200 00:08:31,690 --> 00:08:35,190 - A bottle. - For spinning... [all gasp] 201 00:08:35,280 --> 00:08:38,551 to play spin the bottle into the recycling bin. 202 00:08:38,586 --> 00:08:39,649 [murmurs of disappointment] 203 00:08:39,684 --> 00:08:42,049 Okay, everybody, I'm sorry you got dragged over here. 204 00:08:42,050 --> 00:08:44,369 If you wanna write loser on my forehead, 205 00:08:44,370 --> 00:08:48,459 - I understand. - Ah, I get it. It's a retro party. 206 00:08:48,460 --> 00:08:50,149 - Cool. - Yeah, retro. 207 00:08:50,150 --> 00:08:54,086 - I now think it's cool. - I now think the same. 208 00:08:54,121 --> 00:08:55,799 Damn right, it's a retro party. 209 00:08:55,800 --> 00:08:59,110 Dad, fire up the T-T-Twister. 210 00:09:00,480 --> 00:09:06,219 Left foot green? I did not see that coming. 211 00:09:06,220 --> 00:09:07,739 They look like they're having fun. 212 00:09:07,740 --> 00:09:10,819 - Do you have a Twister game, Bradley? - Heavens no. 213 00:09:10,820 --> 00:09:14,650 I prefer games that challenge the mind. Let's see. 214 00:09:15,820 --> 00:09:18,659 - I have Mille Bornes. - Uh-huh. 215 00:09:18,660 --> 00:09:21,659 - Nine-men's morris. - Sure. 216 00:09:21,660 --> 00:09:23,250 Mancala, cribbage, 217 00:09:23,260 --> 00:09:26,849 Game of the District Messenger Boy. 218 00:09:27,000 --> 00:09:30,099 Or let's have an imaginary tea party. 219 00:09:30,100 --> 00:09:33,249 I generally use my imagination for wondering 220 00:09:33,250 --> 00:09:37,100 what it would be like to live in a colorblind world. 221 00:09:37,600 --> 00:09:40,172 It's getting cold, Bradley. 222 00:09:41,260 --> 00:09:42,660 [slurps] 223 00:09:43,400 --> 00:09:45,899 Come on, guys, we need a viral video. 224 00:09:45,900 --> 00:09:47,749 That strange dude from that shady company 225 00:09:47,750 --> 00:09:51,419 - is counting on us. - Ooh, how about this? 226 00:09:51,420 --> 00:09:54,239 We find an otter and gradually earn its trust 227 00:09:54,240 --> 00:09:57,519 until one day he introduces us to his otter family. 228 00:09:57,520 --> 00:09:59,859 Once we're accepted as one of their own, 229 00:09:59,860 --> 00:10:03,529 we film us working together as a human otter society 230 00:10:03,530 --> 00:10:05,699 to make a dam out of the soda bottles... 231 00:10:05,700 --> 00:10:08,382 Ugh, it's been done before. 232 00:10:09,700 --> 00:10:12,290 Ugh, we need to stimulate our brains. 233 00:10:13,520 --> 00:10:14,779 Caffeine up. 234 00:10:14,780 --> 00:10:17,040 [soda rumbles] 235 00:10:17,780 --> 00:10:19,189 - Whoa! - What the? 236 00:10:19,190 --> 00:10:21,950 Whoa, how did you do that? 237 00:10:21,960 --> 00:10:23,549 What else did you have in your mouth? 238 00:10:23,550 --> 00:10:25,109 I don't know, nothing. 239 00:10:25,110 --> 00:10:27,719 Just this super dangerously caffeinated energy drink 240 00:10:27,720 --> 00:10:30,890 and the breath mint I chew instead of brushing my teeth. 241 00:10:31,970 --> 00:10:33,799 - Whoa! - Oh, my God! 242 00:10:33,800 --> 00:10:35,389 Did anybody else notice that? 243 00:10:35,390 --> 00:10:37,709 If a little Stroke-a and Dentos did that, 244 00:10:37,710 --> 00:10:40,060 think of what a lot of Stroke-a and Dentos could do. 245 00:10:40,070 --> 00:10:41,959 This could be the clean energy solution 246 00:10:41,960 --> 00:10:43,219 we've been looking for. 247 00:10:43,220 --> 00:10:45,739 This is the idea that could change the world. 248 00:10:45,740 --> 00:10:46,900 Mia is right. 249 00:10:47,060 --> 00:10:50,239 Let's build a rocket and see how fast it goes. 250 00:10:50,240 --> 00:10:54,550 We need one of these, but big. Hmm... 251 00:10:55,400 --> 00:10:56,489 [chatters] 252 00:10:56,490 --> 00:10:58,489 Hey, let's use that old hot water heater 253 00:10:58,490 --> 00:11:00,069 my dad told my mom we took to the dump. 254 00:11:00,070 --> 00:11:01,979 We can't be riding around on a rocket. 255 00:11:01,980 --> 00:11:03,089 We have concussions. 256 00:11:03,090 --> 00:11:06,420 No, we don't, Mia One and Mia Two. 257 00:11:06,430 --> 00:11:09,169 [indistinct chatter] 258 00:11:09,170 --> 00:11:11,319 Kimberly, this party is sick. 259 00:11:11,320 --> 00:11:16,099 - And your hair is amazing. - Thanks, I hate it. [laughter] 260 00:11:16,100 --> 00:11:18,509 Quite the little soire�, isn't it? 261 00:11:18,510 --> 00:11:21,589 You guys believed I could be popular even when I didn't. 262 00:11:21,590 --> 00:11:24,170 You are the coolest parents. 263 00:11:25,090 --> 00:11:27,849 Cody's waiting for you at the make out closet. 264 00:11:27,850 --> 00:11:29,929 [gasps] I gotta get rid of my jerk parents. 265 00:11:29,930 --> 00:11:33,339 Who wants cake and/or ice cream? 266 00:11:33,340 --> 00:11:34,449 Mm-mmm. 267 00:11:34,450 --> 00:11:35,840 [laughs] 268 00:11:35,850 --> 00:11:37,619 Mom, Claire's lactose intolerant. 269 00:11:37,620 --> 00:11:40,679 You've gotta go to the store and get sorbet or else she'll die. 270 00:11:40,680 --> 00:11:42,869 Well, or she could just not have the ice cream. 271 00:11:42,870 --> 00:11:44,869 Then she'll kill herself for missing out. 272 00:11:44,870 --> 00:11:47,279 Either way, Claire's dead, and it's on you. 273 00:11:47,280 --> 00:11:50,657 - Hm. - Isn't that right, Claire? 274 00:11:50,820 --> 00:11:52,280 It's true. 275 00:11:52,290 --> 00:11:56,360 Ooh, I'm feeling lightheaded just talking about ice cream. 276 00:11:56,370 --> 00:11:58,719 Okay, okay, as long as your father is here 277 00:11:58,720 --> 00:12:01,039 to keep an eye on things, I'll go. 278 00:12:01,040 --> 00:12:03,889 That was my first lie. You do that every day? 279 00:12:03,890 --> 00:12:05,629 If you don't, you lose your edge. 280 00:12:05,630 --> 00:12:07,630 And now, to the closet. 281 00:12:07,640 --> 00:12:10,899 See, the key to raising a prize-winning watermelon 282 00:12:10,900 --> 00:12:14,139 is lots of water, but not too much water. 283 00:12:14,140 --> 00:12:15,940 Hey, Dad, too bad your guitar's in the shop. 284 00:12:15,964 --> 00:12:18,329 All the kids have been asking about you doing a live set. 285 00:12:18,330 --> 00:12:21,120 Really? Tell your mother to keep an eye on things. 286 00:12:21,144 --> 00:12:23,559 - I've got a gig! - Gotta get ready for my first kiss. 287 00:12:23,560 --> 00:12:25,559 [sucking saliva] 288 00:12:25,560 --> 00:12:26,729 I'm ready. 289 00:12:26,730 --> 00:12:29,159 Hey, where does Dad keep his extra toilet? 290 00:12:29,160 --> 00:12:30,989 Ugh! There's one in the garage. 291 00:12:30,990 --> 00:12:32,550 - What are you doing? - Building a rocket. 292 00:12:32,574 --> 00:12:34,589 What does it look like? What are you doing? 293 00:12:34,590 --> 00:12:35,590 I don't have all day. 294 00:12:35,591 --> 00:12:37,160 My old man's almost out of surgery, 295 00:12:37,170 --> 00:12:39,920 - You're making out with guys? - You're stealing Dad's stuff. 296 00:12:39,930 --> 00:12:41,210 [both together] I'm telling Mom. 297 00:12:41,211 --> 00:12:42,904 Wait, don't tell Mom. 298 00:12:42,939 --> 00:12:45,019 That's Dad's shower chair. He has one rule. 299 00:12:45,020 --> 00:12:46,870 [mockingly] "Don't touch my shower chair." 300 00:12:46,880 --> 00:12:51,613 Once I'm famous, none of us will ever have to shower again. 301 00:12:51,614 --> 00:12:54,257 [wheels creaking] 302 00:12:55,530 --> 00:12:57,869 Have fun at your unsupervised party. 303 00:12:57,870 --> 00:13:01,869 - Did he say "unsupervised"? - Yes, I did. 304 00:13:01,870 --> 00:13:07,786 I've never been unsupervised. Goodbye, coaster! 305 00:13:09,720 --> 00:13:13,863 What a rush! It's seven-layer dip! 306 00:13:15,720 --> 00:13:18,890 I feel them all. [laughs] 307 00:13:21,560 --> 00:13:24,619 Don't just stand there. 308 00:13:24,620 --> 00:13:26,549 We're unsupervised! 309 00:13:26,550 --> 00:13:28,710 [all cheer] 310 00:13:28,720 --> 00:13:29,809 - [pop music] - Hi. 311 00:13:29,810 --> 00:13:31,992 Are you gonna talk this whole time? 312 00:13:32,027 --> 00:13:33,389 You're amazing. Let's kiss. 313 00:13:33,390 --> 00:13:36,719 [gasps] [people screaming] 314 00:13:39,820 --> 00:13:42,300 [laughs] Faster! 315 00:13:45,070 --> 00:13:46,159 Ah! 316 00:13:46,160 --> 00:13:48,589 Okay, who's up for "Secret Life of Pets"? 317 00:13:48,590 --> 00:13:52,297 When the human's away, the pets will... ah! 318 00:13:57,910 --> 00:14:00,010 Okay, all fueled up. 319 00:14:01,770 --> 00:14:03,099 Dang, you serious? 320 00:14:03,260 --> 00:14:05,839 Countdown checklist... steering? 321 00:14:05,840 --> 00:14:07,079 - No. - Brakes? 322 00:14:07,080 --> 00:14:08,910 - No. - Helmets. 323 00:14:08,920 --> 00:14:09,930 - No. - American flag? 324 00:14:09,940 --> 00:14:11,430 Hell yeah. 325 00:14:11,440 --> 00:14:13,769 Duncan, are you really sure you wanna do this? 326 00:14:13,770 --> 00:14:15,329 I have to. 327 00:14:15,330 --> 00:14:17,250 I made a sacred vow to an energy drink sales rep. 328 00:14:17,251 --> 00:14:18,731 Okay, but if you don't make it back, 329 00:14:18,755 --> 00:14:20,669 there's one thing that I want you to know. 330 00:14:20,670 --> 00:14:24,411 - Hm? - This was completely unnecessary. 331 00:14:25,100 --> 00:14:26,279 What up, America? 332 00:14:26,280 --> 00:14:28,509 It's your boy Yangzi streaming to you live 333 00:14:28,510 --> 00:14:29,840 for Stroke-a-Cola Energy Drink, 334 00:14:29,850 --> 00:14:31,959 the only energy drink that will stop your heart 335 00:14:31,960 --> 00:14:33,349 and start your mind. 336 00:14:33,350 --> 00:14:35,369 What you're about to see is totally real, 337 00:14:35,370 --> 00:14:36,680 unlike the moon landing. 338 00:14:36,690 --> 00:14:40,050 - Here we go. - Let's fire this baby up! 339 00:14:41,450 --> 00:14:45,340 Here I come, God, you coward! 340 00:14:46,700 --> 00:14:49,710 - What's wrong? - Hang on, let me jiggle it. 341 00:14:49,720 --> 00:14:51,049 [rocket booms] 342 00:14:51,050 --> 00:14:53,629 [all screaming] 343 00:14:53,630 --> 00:14:57,220 I'm sorry, God! You're so damn brave! 344 00:14:57,370 --> 00:15:00,319 - [deadpan] We're gonna die. - If we die, we die together. 345 00:15:00,320 --> 00:15:02,110 Whoa! 346 00:15:03,850 --> 00:15:05,379 We gotta do something. 347 00:15:05,380 --> 00:15:07,549 Right, let's make a GoFundMe for Duncan's funeral. 348 00:15:07,550 --> 00:15:10,240 His family's gonna be so broke. 349 00:15:12,740 --> 00:15:16,409 Okay, dairy-free desert for the girl who ate half a pizza. 350 00:15:16,410 --> 00:15:19,079 All right, what would 12-year-olds love? 351 00:15:19,080 --> 00:15:21,489 I know, an hour of acoustic Rush! 352 00:15:21,490 --> 00:15:24,399 Jack, you're supposed to be supervising the party. 353 00:15:24,400 --> 00:15:26,829 Kimberly told me you were supervising. 354 00:15:26,830 --> 00:15:28,089 [gasps] 355 00:15:28,090 --> 00:15:30,659 [chuckles] Oh, Annie, you got played. 356 00:15:30,660 --> 00:15:34,350 We both got played like nine-men's morris. 357 00:15:34,385 --> 00:15:35,940 I'm gonna lay down the law on that kid 358 00:15:35,950 --> 00:15:39,079 - as soon as I'm done with my gig. - There is no gig. 359 00:15:39,080 --> 00:15:41,480 First one home gets to ground Kimberly. 360 00:15:42,770 --> 00:15:44,729 [tires squealing] 361 00:15:44,730 --> 00:15:46,009 [screams] 362 00:15:46,010 --> 00:15:47,410 - Oh! - [grunts] 363 00:15:48,760 --> 00:15:51,349 Jack, you're driving too fast and too furious. 364 00:15:51,350 --> 00:15:56,337 It's for family, Annie. All we got is family... family! 365 00:15:58,950 --> 00:16:01,599 Duncan? What the hell are you doing? 366 00:16:01,600 --> 00:16:04,210 A viral stunt. I wanna be famous and kill Spider-Man. 367 00:16:04,220 --> 00:16:06,339 Is that my shower chair? 368 00:16:06,340 --> 00:16:09,609 I have one rule, Duncan! One rule! 369 00:16:09,610 --> 00:16:11,609 [siren blares] 370 00:16:11,610 --> 00:16:15,821 - [over PA] You on the water heater, pull over. - Can't, no brakes. 371 00:16:15,856 --> 00:16:17,421 I got a shot. Should I open fire? 372 00:16:17,456 --> 00:16:19,661 Did you learn nothing from the seminar? 373 00:16:20,550 --> 00:16:22,470 [screams] 374 00:16:22,480 --> 00:16:25,380 I can't stop wetting myself! 375 00:16:25,390 --> 00:16:27,979 He is surprisingly excited about that. 376 00:16:27,980 --> 00:16:32,649 Whoo-hoo-hoo! We're at 999,000. 377 00:16:32,650 --> 00:16:34,559 We're about to be famous forever. 378 00:16:34,560 --> 00:16:36,749 [rocket roars] [crash] 379 00:16:36,750 --> 00:16:38,970 [pop music] 380 00:16:38,980 --> 00:16:40,320 [gasps] 381 00:16:40,330 --> 00:16:42,589 Hey, you know what's more fun than stabbing? 382 00:16:42,590 --> 00:16:46,409 Sitting. [chuckles] 383 00:16:46,410 --> 00:16:48,220 - [screams] - [laughs] 384 00:16:49,590 --> 00:16:51,079 Mom's cart! 385 00:16:51,080 --> 00:16:52,409 Hey, you know what's also extreme? 386 00:16:52,410 --> 00:16:54,669 Charging that in the outlet. 387 00:16:54,670 --> 00:16:56,489 Okay. 388 00:16:56,490 --> 00:16:57,659 Hi-yah! 389 00:16:57,660 --> 00:16:59,840 Hey, are those my dad's Steely Dan albums? 390 00:16:59,850 --> 00:17:02,606 - Yeah. - Carry on. 391 00:17:02,920 --> 00:17:04,320 Hi-yah! 392 00:17:08,670 --> 00:17:10,729 What the heck is happening down there? 393 00:17:10,730 --> 00:17:12,949 They're acting out because they don't know 394 00:17:12,950 --> 00:17:14,930 how to cope with their hormones. 395 00:17:14,940 --> 00:17:17,099 I wanna be friends with my hormones. 396 00:17:17,100 --> 00:17:22,290 There's no way around adolescence... only through. 397 00:17:22,690 --> 00:17:25,850 - Wanna act like puppies? - Okay. 398 00:17:25,860 --> 00:17:28,836 [barking] 399 00:17:29,280 --> 00:17:31,209 Why aren't you making any sounds? 400 00:17:31,210 --> 00:17:35,016 I'm a basenji, the barkless dog. 401 00:17:35,051 --> 00:17:37,156 [sighs] Of course you are. 402 00:17:37,380 --> 00:17:39,060 Claire, we've gotta figure out a cool way 403 00:17:39,084 --> 00:17:40,369 to shut this party down. 404 00:17:40,370 --> 00:17:41,370 [gasps] 405 00:17:41,540 --> 00:17:44,209 What's that in your hand? Is that a peanut? 406 00:17:44,210 --> 00:17:45,559 Don't you dare. You're allergic! 407 00:17:45,560 --> 00:17:48,559 My entire life, I've never had one. 408 00:17:48,560 --> 00:17:52,659 I have to know! Take my EpiPen. 409 00:17:52,660 --> 00:17:54,809 Claire, no, if your throat closes, 410 00:17:54,810 --> 00:17:56,489 who will help me clean? 411 00:17:56,490 --> 00:17:57,480 [inhales] 412 00:17:57,481 --> 00:17:58,979 See you on the other side. 413 00:17:58,980 --> 00:18:01,069 [rocket rumbles] 414 00:18:01,070 --> 00:18:05,910 Wow, it's everything my allergist said... 415 00:18:05,945 --> 00:18:07,630 [screams] 416 00:18:09,010 --> 00:18:13,253 [people screaming] 417 00:18:16,850 --> 00:18:19,640 [people continue screaming] 418 00:18:21,930 --> 00:18:25,599 - [people cheer] - [inhales rapidly] 419 00:18:25,600 --> 00:18:27,839 I think I do better with supervision. 420 00:18:27,840 --> 00:18:29,029 [groans] 421 00:18:29,030 --> 00:18:30,710 Duncan, how many fingers am I holding up? 422 00:18:30,734 --> 00:18:31,679 One. 423 00:18:31,680 --> 00:18:34,990 And what's my one rule? Oh. 424 00:18:40,456 --> 00:18:41,689 [explosion] 425 00:18:41,810 --> 00:18:43,809 All right, kids, everyone go home. 426 00:18:43,810 --> 00:18:46,050 Nothing to see here. 427 00:18:46,060 --> 00:18:47,239 Are you kidding? 428 00:18:47,240 --> 00:18:48,920 A toilet just took out a police helicopter. 429 00:18:48,944 --> 00:18:50,909 Kimberly threw the greatest party of all time. 430 00:18:50,910 --> 00:18:53,390 [kids cheer] 431 00:18:53,400 --> 00:18:56,169 Whoa, hold on, Margot's parents are lost at sea. 432 00:18:56,170 --> 00:18:58,159 She's home alone until they find them. 433 00:18:58,160 --> 00:19:01,239 - They've got a finished basement. - And her dad has a hookah! 434 00:19:01,240 --> 00:19:02,750 Margot's the new Kimberly! 435 00:19:02,760 --> 00:19:04,640 [kids cheer] 436 00:19:06,350 --> 00:19:09,909 [grunts] What up, dumbasses? You know me. 437 00:19:09,910 --> 00:19:12,244 Daryl Chrisakowsi, senior VP of digital youth 438 00:19:12,245 --> 00:19:14,579 marketing for Stroke-a-Cola energy drink. 439 00:19:14,580 --> 00:19:16,930 So am I the new face of Stroke-a-Cola? 440 00:19:16,940 --> 00:19:18,249 Absolutely. 441 00:19:18,250 --> 00:19:20,919 Wait, I said that wrong. No. 442 00:19:20,920 --> 00:19:23,420 You, peanut girl. How'd you like to be the face 443 00:19:23,430 --> 00:19:26,109 of a company involved in three class action lawsuits? 444 00:19:26,240 --> 00:19:28,830 - Okay. - But I almost died. 445 00:19:28,840 --> 00:19:31,669 And I appreciate that, but she did die. 446 00:19:31,670 --> 00:19:33,899 - I saw God. - I love it. 447 00:19:33,900 --> 00:19:36,300 The Christian market is gonna eat you up. 448 00:19:37,920 --> 00:19:40,800 Bye, dumbasses! 449 00:19:41,760 --> 00:19:44,739 [both together] I was so close. 450 00:19:44,740 --> 00:19:46,409 Popularity is for losers. 451 00:19:46,410 --> 00:19:48,634 Yeah, they're probably all in Margot's stupid 452 00:19:48,635 --> 00:19:50,859 finished basement making out like idiots. 453 00:19:50,860 --> 00:19:54,860 - Yeah, losers. - Yeah. [sucks saliva] 454 00:19:56,360 --> 00:19:59,849 The quest for celebrity is a hollow pursuit. 455 00:19:59,850 --> 00:20:02,929 Validation must come from within. 456 00:20:02,930 --> 00:20:04,200 Socrates posited... 457 00:20:04,210 --> 00:20:07,014 [together] Bradley, go home! 458 00:20:07,100 --> 00:20:10,323 Very well. [panting weakly] 459 00:20:11,190 --> 00:20:13,879 I have never been more furious at you kids in my life. 460 00:20:14,000 --> 00:20:15,389 The only thing that'll calm me down 461 00:20:15,390 --> 00:20:17,579 is eating the watermelon I spent all summer growing 462 00:20:17,580 --> 00:20:21,572 while listening to the soothing jazz rock of Steely Dan. 463 00:20:24,750 --> 00:20:28,409 No! No, no, no, no, no, no! 464 00:20:28,410 --> 00:20:30,964 Okay, kids, go inside and tell your dad 465 00:20:30,965 --> 00:20:33,519 how sorry you are and how much you love him. 466 00:20:33,520 --> 00:20:36,429 - Mom, no! - What did I do? 467 00:20:36,430 --> 00:20:39,109 Please, just beat us! 468 00:20:44,790 --> 00:20:46,899 It's sturdy, but I don't feel cradled. 469 00:20:46,900 --> 00:20:49,459 It's just so hard to tell with my clothes on. 470 00:20:49,460 --> 00:20:50,790 What do you think, honey? 471 00:20:50,800 --> 00:20:53,299 They're all equally pathetic. Jack, pick one. 472 00:20:53,300 --> 00:20:55,389 Duncan, you selfishly destroyed my chair. 473 00:20:55,390 --> 00:20:56,649 What do you think? 474 00:20:56,650 --> 00:20:59,299 Ugh, quiet, I'm watching something important. 475 00:20:59,300 --> 00:21:00,650 [gasps] 476 00:21:00,660 --> 00:21:02,410 Shock your system with Stroke-a-Cola. 477 00:21:02,420 --> 00:21:04,069 Ugh, no fair. 478 00:21:04,070 --> 00:21:06,569 Why couldn't I have been born with deadly allergies? 479 00:21:06,570 --> 00:21:08,089 [gasps] Look at this. 480 00:21:08,090 --> 00:21:10,569 Claire's at Coachella with Shut Up, Trish, and Spider-Man. 481 00:21:10,570 --> 00:21:11,829 Come on, take a sit. 482 00:21:11,830 --> 00:21:14,169 I don't have time to sit in the shower, okay? 483 00:21:14,170 --> 00:21:16,150 I'm a busy, working mother. 484 00:21:16,160 --> 00:21:18,579 I'm juggling home and... [gasps] 485 00:21:18,580 --> 00:21:20,579 - Oh, my God. - Right? 486 00:21:20,580 --> 00:21:22,489 Scooch over. 487 00:21:22,490 --> 00:21:26,510 Now imagine the water's been running for 90 minutes. 488 00:21:26,520 --> 00:21:27,679 [both moaning] 489 00:21:27,680 --> 00:21:29,499 - Oh, my goodness. - Oh. 490 00:21:29,500 --> 00:21:31,180 - Ew, ew, ew, ew, ew. - God, stop. 491 00:21:31,190 --> 00:21:32,650 Blegh. 492 00:21:33,960 --> 00:21:37,141 493 00:21:37,191 --> 00:21:41,741 Repair and Synchronization by Easy Subtitles Synchronizer 1.0.0.0